Christmas compositions

The inevitable 'Christmas Rush' has officially showed signs of its presence. The people of Stockholm along with the rest of the western world have been on the run for the seasonal bargains, thinking of their families as they roam the city with a decreased pace. Working citizens are either motivated to squeeze out that extra productivity or are completely dazzled by the holiday ambiance, whoever they are and wherever they are, they all know that Christmas is just around the corner. And in tribute to that I've made spontaneous little pieces for you instead of greeting you the normal way.


-Winter Warmerland-

The year has finally come to en end
And winter teases the world below
Thinking she would her throne defend
Until we pump her with gas and go

Her silvery dominance, untouched in years
Will yield to cowfarts, burnt plastic and tires
Her icy smile will drown in warm tears
And thus will her empire expire

The land of the north where she is most known,
Denies the crude, and lonely fact...
That her blanket of snow and frosty cones
Would soon vanish if they don't act.

This Christmas they stand on thin ice sheets
That may no longer remain for years to come
And eventually what mankind will meet
Is a dark, warm Christmas morning hum.

-PMS (Presumably Mad Snowman) rant-

It's that time of the year again, hello there girls and boys! I assume you've been doing good so that fat man with a 'thing' for kids and reindeers will bring you stuff from his factory of child-like slaves dressed in tight revealing outfits.
...Me? I'm doing good I guess, I mean after all; I'm only here as proof and assurance that you'll have a White Christmas. In fact, I'll work all winter. You and your families will sit indoors and enjoy the holidays while I stand out there alone eating snowflakes. Do you know what eating snowflakes makes me? A CANNIBAL!

Now I'm beginning to understand the difference between God and man and why man will never be as efficient as its creator, it's because they fuck up on the simplest things. God made Eve when he realized Adam was alone, but no man has ever thought of making me someone I could relate with, let alone other 'aherm' stuff.

Oh don't feel pity for me now, damage has already been done! Go home to your warm and cuddly families and leave me be here on my own, after all, that's what you, my creators, want anyway right?

I keep telling myself that I'm used to this sort of inhumane treatment until I have to go through it all over again.. year after year. It pushed me to a point that I really wish global warming prevails so that I'll never have to come here and see your ungrateful faces!!!

But I'll leave you all with one thought, I may be as useless to you but never forget that when you designed me, you made me out of what you're not and what you don't have.
I may be half your size but I consist of THREE balls and I have a nose longer than your average dicks! Suck it earth-dweller, may you all die in hell!!!

White Lies from kind people (Doo pRatawr Jettebraw Svenskaah)

I've spent 4 years in this wonderful country, experienced its weather, its culture, met its people and even got educated here. But the one thing that I haven't truly gotten a grasp of is the language, yeah sure my Swedish is good enough to comprehend books and TV shows but it still doesn't meet the standards needed to live here for the next 20 years (work in progress..)

And throughout my entire linguistic journey, I've noticed a thing or two about how Swedes react to foreigners speaking their language badly. Whenever I speak Swedish or discuss about my Swedish in front of Swedes in Sweden, the reactions can go one of 2 ways...

First possibility: If you try to order food in Swedish or put your limited Swedish out for a spin for practice, people will then suddenly respond in English.

And in this scenario, 2 intentions may be put to play it's either:
1.The Swede is disgusted by your incompetence in his/her language OR
2. The Swede intends to let you know that he/she can in fact speak English! Ere'go there is no need for you to try and force yourself to find vocab when he/she can do it easier on a language you're more comfortable at.
Wasn't the point of you speaking Swedish in the first place is to get some practice?

Second scenario: If talking to a Swede about your Swedish, they will compliment you and tell you how fluent you are in Swedish even though you know just as well that you sound like a moose being slaughtered by 7 lumberjacks with silver chainsaws.

These 2 reactions are the most common ones.

Swedes will never say how much you suck at their language or how much work you need, they'll in fact compliment you by giving you a thumbs up..

Now tell me, are these white lies even worth telling when the person whom you're telling the lies to know that the compliments are utter bullpoop? In my experience, I take it more of a slap when a Swede tells me that my Swedish is perfect or is brilliant.
I wasn't born yesterday, I KNOW my Swedish is far from fluent and I'm not dumb enough to believe otherwise.

Därför skriver jag min blogg på engelska och undvika prata svenska när det gäller formella saker. =D

Peace out and piss off!

Sweden is the Dr. Jekyll of Europe

Swedes are probably one the most kind-hearted, sympathetic, kind, respectful/able group of people to ever roam the earth, it seems that all those years of being barbaric European overlords paid back in today's times. After a long history of the vikings, it appears as if God took Sweden by the ear and snipped its balls right off. Case and point, in modern war history, Sweden is known to Europe as one of the two countries (Switzerland) who chickened out during the fight against the dude with the weird mustache. The resemblance between Sweden's international reputation over the year and Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde is uncanny and is well deserved of ridicule and humiliation/compliment.

Although I wonder, would Sweden be an environment friendly, peace-loving, wine-guzzling country had it not been for their cowardly courageous decision a few decades back? Would they still be deemed as the alpha male of European history?

The days of yours when mead was water and raw meat was stripped off the poor howling arctic wolf's impaled body by meat-hungry Swedes.. nowadays, you see Swedes eating meatballs with cute little potato cutlets and salad.

Back then, men wore outrageous metal armors, leather vests, and that signature horned helmet that portray power and manliness, now they wear jeans tighter than a rope on a suicidal man's neck. What once was the epitome of MAN turned into the literal description of WOMAN. Could it have something to do with the cultural shifts over the decades? the successful feminist movement + the obsession with gender equality? Could it possibly be that women are indirectly running this country? That's another story.



_______Before Darin_______After Darin

Swine Flu Paranoia

The outbreak of the H1N1 virus took mankind from behind and put the entire world into universal panic, the media made sure that every one who is literate enough to understand the word "pig" and "death" are thoroughly terrified of a virus that has so far killed less people than a hamster with rabies.

All posh countries like Sweden immediately signed up to be the first ones to be provided with a vaccine for he flu, and by the time the vaccine was available; Swedish health authorities and media were overwhelmed by the arrival of the 'life-saving' vaccine.

Just this fall, Swedes stood in countless queues for hours just to get vaccinated and I for one found it ridiculous at first and told myself that something as weak as the swine flu virus will never be able to defeat my league of invincible immune system soldiers, but then I was brainwashed to get vaccinated anyway (no biggy).

But it's interesting to figure out how the swine flu alert affected the Swedish public. Of course the opinions and reactions to it vary demographically. Older folks see the virus as a way bigger threat than let's say... teenagers. They actually forbade handshakes and kisses on working places to avoid the transfer of the virus which is in fact stupid because it is a well known fact that the virus can be transferred by air, so simply BREATHING close to anyone is a potential threat.

Luckily enough, I haven't seen anyone wearing a surgical mask yet. I wonder how big this paranoia will be? Don't you? more updates on this later... =D

"..till death do us part...".... MY ASS!

From where I come from, it is a societal MUST to have a mom and dad, it's always a package, afterall, without papa's splooge and momma's acidic baby factory I wouldn't be here...
Up till now, I still have a very efficient mother and a functioning father and an unwanted (potentially accidental) little sister (I'm KIDDING OK?) And.. I've always wondered how I'd be as a person without the full elements of a nuclear family, without a mother, I'd probably would not even be here in Sweden and writing this blog, without a father, I'd probably be gay. And without a sister... hrrm... nah.. too good to be true.

It has always come to me as a surprise when I meet other kids who:
1. Lost a parent
2. Had a single parent
3. Product of a divorced couple
4. Have a 3rd thumb (I met one in the 1st grade)

Whenever I encounter such people, I could never help thinking that they must be either traumatised or used to the entire thing, specially when they've grown up with both parents.

Until a few years ago (thanks again Sweden), I've always seen divorce as one of the harshest thing that could happen in life (next to death, Hitler, and Mel Gibson movies).
Apparantly, it's a growing trend here in Sweden, not that it's a bad thing, it's just an observation. and once again, i'm not stereotyping Swedes.. just saying that Sweden has the HIGHEST divorce rate in the world with a mouth-watering 55%

as proven by this blog http://www.darndivorce.com/divorce-rates-around-the-world/

First of all... WOW! And secondly, how is this even possible? The marriage vows I grew up with included words like... "..through thick and thin, in sickness and in health, till death do us part.."

It lit a fire up my taint knowing how lightly couples take their divorce here.. okay, so people don't pull off a Britney Spears wedding when drunk, divorce when sober stunt.. But as far as I'm concerned, they might as well do so.

The real victims aren't the couples, their products of love (or lust) are the ones affected by the divorce.. I've met, still know and adored people who are products of a divorce. Majority of whom live with their mothers after the divorce... This can be seen in 2 shades.. one, it's only fair the mom takes the child because she endured the "magic" of childbirth (which we know is full of screams of pain and blood).. on the other buttcheek, it's also possible that it's unfair that the mom keeps the child, she already endured childbirth, let dad handle the puberty and teenage rebellion. In the end, it all depends on how much of a douche the child is.

On top of all of this, it's the women who usually initiates the divorce as discussed more thoroughly in this blog: http://mangans.blogspot.com/2008/02/feminism-birth-rates-divorce.html

Girl power has reached a new level of liberation and me no like it too much do I? =(
more than 70% of the 55% divorces were initiates by the wives, and only to be strengthened this year by Beyonce who released 2 singles in a row depicting feministic insights and evul husbands... thank you so much Beyonce, I thank you for all the crying children who'll never grow up with a father figure just so you can dance around in leotards being sexy and all... *drools*

And for parents out there... NO it's not ok to get a divorce just because your child's in college and is financially independent... it... still... hurts... ok? Now be happy and remember what that ring on your finger symbolizes.

Sexcalators

He's just exposing his girlfriend to rape

I have long accepted the fact that public display of affection is nothing new or abnormal in this country and furthermore have I most absolutely learned to avoid cringing when listening to the sound of tongues rubbing against each other giving out a medium-pitched squeak that can only be interpreted as kissing or a prairie dog defacating.

Maybe the overly passionate behaviour of the Svenish can explain the sky rocketing divorce rate in this country. Kissing and sex isn't as 'special' as it once deemed to be. And by all means, go ahead! Not only does it give the makeout an extra sensation by doing it in public, it also provides entertainment for the sexually deprived.

But like any other anything everywhere somehow, there is a LIMIT. Public makeouts are part of the daily scenarios one would see in a typical spring day in Stockholm, the Swedes are nature-oriented beings... with that being said, the rate of makeouts show a significant increase during the spring, just in coordination with mating season for the rabbits. You'll find them everywhere!! The park, the beach, the bushes, under the trees, by the lake and sometimes even by some garden...... and no I wasn't referring to rabbits.

And just for the record, Swedish rabbits are well known for having more horns than a trceratops convention. According to this other blog http://images.google.com/imgres?imgurl=http://www.sex-and-blogs.com/xxx/coniglio%255B1%255D.jpg&imgrefurl=http://sex-and-blogs.com/flavor/who_knows/index.php%3Fpage%3D15&usg=__q7BmUku8bimKBPwLeJUFu9nW7s0=&h=325&w=281&sz=16&hl=en&start=96&sig2=8rfkfjsIkq2Yc2UxbPu4PQ&um=1&tbnid=1LX1jzyxKFQ03M:&tbnh=118&tbnw=102&prev=/images%3Fq%3Drabbits%2Bmating%26ndsp%3D18%26hl%3Den%26safe%3Doff%26sa%3DN%26start%3D90%26um%3D1&ei=ngLQSb-YF4-E_Aa0iKWKCg

I know right? this male rabbit below is said to be the kinkiest furball ever in SWEDEN! Believed to have fathered 4,556 rabbits in ONE year... did i mention rabbits can only give birth to one baby at a time? (ok this part is a lie) ahah.. But 4,556 rabbits in one year is still a humongous account nevertheless, not to mention the "barnbidrag" he has to go through.

Eventually he died of birdflu....

I don't really have much complaints about seeing lovers 'love' in general, but the escalator is just taking it a step too far!!! An escalator is the LEAST romantic setting to play tongue tennis... For a number of many reasons can we conclude that escalators are meant for transportation not fornication.

It just appears so utterly irrelevant to swap humanslime in a moving stairway with other people being a breath away from you.... Nothing is held sacred in this city, these horndogs will find any excuse to publicly announce that they're aiming to conceive.... herpes....

How difficult is it to go through a 15 second ride without having to pornographize? I mean, there's a right place and a right time for that and I don't really concurr that during an escalator trip would be the brightest idea to count each other's teeth. Usually the couple occupies the entire escalator panel leaving no room for anyone to storm ahead of them therefore rendering bystanders with no other option than to simmer that humidity and friction created by the couple.

Understanding this kind of monstrosity reveals a slightly taller order than perceived. What seems to be simply a natural display of human outteraction may also be an attempt to materialize a hidden fetish, whatever it may be.... we need not be informed thank you. >_>

I don't see how these couples could possibly enjoy the sensation with a little boy and a toothless retiree curiously eyeballing them.

So the next time you feel the urge to slobber on your partner, please do take the time to punch yourself in the underworld before taking any uneccesarily annoying actions.

Free Hugs Campaign NOT NEEDED here... thank you and goodbye.

This, among all of the other posts would probably be the only optimistic one up to date.

During my initial months as a dweller in Köttbulland, I was still a naive, young, and (*this is my blog and I can say whatever I want*) sexy beast and had no idea about the do's and don'ts of the Svedeesh culture; nevertheless I moved on as it was my only choice even if I stood rotting in a corner of my hotel room. Eventually, I got myself into the school that defined who I am today (DAMN YOUUUUU!!!!!)
Anyway, I had a rough start in school cuz back then, my english had been stagnant for 5 years and there was no way to even think of beginning to speak... I didn't really get the overall picture of the surroundings, it was kind of walking into a giant abstract painting, not knowing what makes sense.

Skipping onto a few months after my first day at school, I was actually able to communicate in a really awkward and really rehearsed manner, anyone with an ounce of brain can tell that I wasn't being me and rather testing the waters so to say, but I somehow was never really attached to someone who could teach me the ways of the swedish society.

And one of the major culture shocks for me are the constant hugging. Regardless of gender, age or skin diseases, hugging is a normal way of greeting for most Swedish people, handshakes have hit rock bottom and is only used as a gesture with acquaintances (for the most part).

With that being said, a former classmate of mine whom we will hide under the name Yemmy Woo Berreira Tos Cantos who is as sweet as fried frog legs dipped in chocolate syrup had the really unfortunate coincidence of greeting me in the morning when I woke up at the wronf side of the bed (leaning towards an open electric fan) with a cheerful bouncy and unexpected HUG!!!
So there came the hug, the smile and the cheerful "Good Morning!"... without even thinking about it, my first reaction was to flee from cooties, I literally almost teleported away with the concrete culture shock, it wasn't until after a few seconds later that I realised that it wasn't meant to be anything weird... But it was too late, the damage is done, she was left there with empty rounded arms and a WTF-face to provide the icing on the awkward cake.

Back then I didn't really know that hugs were casual and practiced daily, I thought girls can get pregnant from hugs (Ok, this one is just a lie! *aherm* yeah). Point being, I was never really used to giving or receiving hugs from ANYONE apart from my dogs and my ex, always thought it was more than a friendly gesture. This tiny event broke the cultural ice for me, I was urged to rewrite my thoughts and moreover remove my mask and let everything in me hang out for everyone to see (except THAT).

I never really got to openly apologized to her but I gave her the best hugs I could in the coming years^^

Now I'm used to it:AS LONG AS IT DOESN'T REACH TO THIS!!!!!!!!O_O

There is no Swedish way of saying "Home Delivery"

As a person of ultimate laziness, I must say that home delivery is one of the best sytems ever to emerge on any civilisation. To be able to sit at home after a hard day's work and have food delivered to you at your doorstep is just something I think we all deserve every once in a while.

There are times of the year ( WINTER) that you may not want to bother taking 15 minutes to put on appropriate clothing just to go out of the house and get food, it's times like these where home delivery is a must. Unfortunately, Sweden doesn't offer this kind of luxury, you want food, you find food. Oftentimes starvation forces you to forage/hunt for food like those furry things in the discovery channel.

It's painstakingly bothersome to disrupt your nice evening by tackling the cold for survival, it's like the Soviet union all over again, except without the famine.

The closest you can get is called "avhämtning" aka "you order in advance by phone and we'll wait for you to pick it up". In humanistic countries, if the food isn't delivered at your doorstep within 30 minutes, you get it free! Here, if you don't pick it up before 30 minutes, not only will your food be cold, but you'll have to spend another 30 minutes going home which will make it colder... By the time you get home, you'll end up with just another regular T.V. dinner... So much for ordering at a resto.

..Did I mention that some places charge extra for avhämtning?.. yeah so, let's see the odds

Bad sides to it
1. waste money on phonecall
2. extra charge for the service
3. waste of time and money/gas to pick food up
4. food gets cold before you can even lick it.
5. Let alone food is overpriced as it is.

Good side (notice how I intentionally left out an "s" on the word side)
1. You get excercise


I'd rather go on a Lord of the Rings marathon to cover the hunger and lull myself to sleep until the next day.

And if I ever die doing that, blame the pizzerias. =(

A dead crowd is a good crowd

Around a couple of weeks ago (28th of January), OASIS did a concert in Globen and tore the stage apart with their heart warming songs, soft melodic music, meaningful lyrics and potty mouths. It was, suffice to say, A-m-a-z-i-n-g!

In the middle of the concert, as they were performing their famous song "Slide Away", my attention drifted away to the audience. I had no expectations really, but I did assume a somehow fluid crowd, a bit of a silent riot, or the usual "I love you OASIS" signs.

Sadly enough, when you look at it from a distant angle, all you'll see is a bunch of guys playing music in front of what seems to be the league of the living dead!!!!

Compared to the crowd in the conert, these guys are actually quite enthusiastic!!

I've been to a number of concerts here in Stockholm, and I have to say, not even a rock band as loud as Linkin' Park could drive a crowd into wild, screaming, mindless, groupies. But at the same time, they're not completely petrified either, somewhere in between (lagom). It seems as if Swedes have been culturally modified to hold in their excitement until after the performance. (who knows to what other activities this rule applies to..)

Whether it be concert or simply a motivational talk, you'll find that Swedish audience will give all 5 senses to you, which is actually a very courteous gesture as of intention but may appear to be an insult when a public performer/speaker expects a bit more reaction.

I guess for Swedes, it is a bit disrespectful to interrupt, but on the other hand, interruptions and hecklers are proof that someone's listening to you genuinely.

Despite the common misconceptions of Swedish audiences, I guess it's better than going to a concert and only being able to hear the crowd shouting instead of the singer him/her self.

There really is no set conclusion for this entry, i wasn't trying to deliver a message, just some brainfarts that I get oftentimes. =)

Public Privacy 2 "Shhh! you're on the phone"

Of all the things that are socially awkward in Sweden, this has got to be one of the most illogical one. Not because I simply don't approve of the idea bis but more because of the ironic nature of the behaviour.

First and foremost, I think some people here forget the layman's defintion of a cellphone and its purpose of existence in this technologically abusive world. Once again, my statements may sound exaggerated but nevertheless...

It seems like everytime I pick up my phone (Specially in public transportation), I immediately become the momentary asshole... Just in general, people here don't talk aloud given any circumstances, it's almost as if they're genetically designed to have a low tolerance for ¨loud¨ noises... whether it be on the train, a bus, in a restaurant, even in concerts..

In terms of public privacy, I guess this example is a bit of an opposite, it's proper to respect the privacy of everyone around you by trying to keep as much of the phonecall informationt to yourself. Personally, I'm immune to this trait despite of my attempt to completely blend into the society, whenever I'm on the phone, I'll speak to the person just as if he/she was in front of me... I mean, that's why phones were made in the first place right Mr. Graham Bell?

Ok, they don't bash you for talking on the phone openly, but it just feels that a cloud of demeaning aura is enveloping every living cell in your poor defenseless body. Swedes have a telepathic knife that can go right through all your moral barriers and pierce you right on the uncomfortable side of your sould. haha..

I often feel ashamed whenever my phone rings but at the same time feels nice to be a silence-breaker once in a while.. =)

"I buy you drink, You be my girlfriend"

The title in itself is very self-explanatory, however, that wouldn't satisfy my cravings to write nor will it provide any form of leisure to my non-existent readers.

I'll do my best to not talk too authoritatively about this issue because I am only a part-time flirt and would best be with usual friends when out for a drink. But since I'm the king of this page and there's barely anyone to thwat me with the hand of judgement, I'll go right ahead and splurt out as much confident words are possible.

So it begins... You're a foreigner and is out one night, with a bunch of losers whom you call your friends and you all go to where the happy-hap's at! The night is young, the streets are busy, the usual Friday night. And halfway through the night, when you're under the power of the alcohol Gods, you start feeling a bit more loose, in both speech and wallet. That's when you'd start feeling a bit generous, as in, you'd want to buy someone(s) a round, or ask a friend to take a shot with you...

So you incidentally randomly pick a girl friend, you go the counter, get two drinks, and go back to the table and hand it to her. Then all of a sudden, the situation turns awkward, she'll most likely stare at you with a "what-do-you-want-from-me" look. That's when you realize that girls here in Stockholm don't like the idea of anyone buying them a drink under any circumstances apart from flirting.

As an emphasis to 'Square Dating' I'll have to mention the fact that a drink here is so costy that giving it away is basically asking someone out.



Wonder what this means..

I'm not too keen on the concept I must rather say, sometimes, when your generosity gets turned down, it tends to disrupt your piece of mind. :D

And of course, it's a mirror effect. If you accept a drink from any person apart from your really close buddies, it means you're indirectly saying "yes" to a "can we hit it off?" question. I learned this the HARD way when I accepted a drink (while drunk myself) from a random DUDE on a cruise ship disco place. I apologized and explained that I'm straight and terminally ill and is in no shape whatsoever to physically connect with anyone because that would lead to serious respiratory consequences. (Yeah I tend to become a bit more unrealistic when drunk)

These minute cultural differences are things that are most memorable to me, therefore, it is just righteous that I try and compile them in this blog to look back to when I get Alzheimer's.

I'm losing my formality so I'd like to thank you all for reading this up to now, and promise that this blog will only get better with time.

Outran by a Gran

feels wrong doesn't it?

There are times that one feels insecure, times when you just feel the need to fold all the way back to the womb, and for most people, insecurity is natural and is usually explainable.
Unfortunately, the insecurity that this entry will talk about are those that truly manage to eliminate all traces of pride and masculinity in me.

I've seen amazing people in this world, those regular citizens/superheroes types, every culture that I have had the honor to live in have bolted a permanent impact on me. Sweden definitely caused my eyeballs to temporarily jump out of their sockets, and this is due to the remarkably strong physical conditions of the elderly here in Sweden.
The beloved crooked ones here are just as physically competetive as they were during ancient times (yeah 20 years ago counts as ancient).

As a young, 'healthy'/alive(same s*it) man, I refused to accept that an 85-yr old, pacemaker-dependent woman can cover more distance than me and do it faster. Thus comes the true story of me being "Outran by a Gran".
I'm afraid McDonalds is taking a toll on me, on us, the youth. =(

So to comfort myself from this traumatizing realization, I just make up a false fact and believe that all people who were born before 1950 contain the thousands of souls that died during those times and that these souls unite with the souls of the living and therefore providing superhuman abilities to today's elderlies.
But reality holds none of these "facts", the seniors of Sweden are pampered to full potential health and have learned to keep their vibrance throughout the centuries/decades(same s*it).

But most of all, I've learned to pay more respect to the soon-to-be-fertilizers of this world. Now I understand that the age-package doesn't always come with an inevitable slowdeath-BONUS and that we can choose to keep our bones and muscles lubricated and functionable even as old farts.

Now that I come and think about it, maybe the 'age of decomposition' isn't too bad afterall, maybe Ill reconsider my suicide plan when i'm 50. All these, just because of the Gubbar and Kärringar of Stockholm.... =D love you all, more health.

Highway Hierarchy

Have you ever given acknowledgement to the remarkably unusual traffic culture here in Sweden? The patterns, behaviours and rules of the road... The attitudes of drivers... And most importantly, the relation between vehicles and pedestrians...

If you haven't yet, then stick around for a few more hundred words or so... (please?)

As a pedestrian, and as a foreigner to this country, I can say that I feel more secure crossing that streets of Stockholm than anywhere else in the world. Up until I moved here, I always believed that the highways are strictly vehicle territory and should be feared, I felt like a zebra swimming accross a crocodile-filled river whenever I crossed the street.

Here in Stockholm, due to the unusual but awesome 'balance of power' between drivers and pedestrian, crossing the streets is a piece of cake even for a snail. In many places accross the globe, drivers see pedestrians as green lights. Not in Stockholm, stepping on a pedestrian lane here is just as good as building a wall around you while crossing.

Drivers in Stockholm will literally put their own safety on the line just to avoid running over you, but don't feel too special, it's not because they don't have the heart to hit you senseless but it's because of the consequences they'd have to face if they do.

Not to mention that, when crossing a street without a traffic light, Stockholm's drivers will stop and let you cross first. For those of you who are reading this and think this isn't unusual, I can guarantee that half a globe away, pedestrians are the ones waiting for the vehicles to pass before crossing. Or they just jaywalk.

This is the only place where a cab driver with a pregnant passenger, whose water just broke and is out of gas, will wait for an entire battalion of asian tourists to cross the street before it resumes in motion.

In the end, there is NO one King of the Road here... In my eyes, the pedestrians are the ignorant ones, the vehicles are the tolerant ones and the cyclist are the oppressed ones.

Pedestrians are ignorant because they know they have a bit more power over the other two according to the law. Vehicles know they have the most physical power so they humble themselves, and cyclist are oppressed because of the fact that they were only given a small fraction of the road and still pedestrians interrupt, but when they go to the big roads, vehicles put them in their place.

-Vehicles won't hit pedestrians but will most likely harrass the cyclist who dares cycle on the highway.

-Pedestrians are not afraid of crossing the streets but more afraid of walking along the bicycle lanes.

-Cyclists don't hesitate hitting a pedestrian who dares block a 1.5m wide road but will fear vehicles because they have no choice but to do so.

So a triangle of hierarchy is form. Vehicles are dominant to cyclists but not pedestrians, pedestrians are dominant to vehicles but not cyclists, and cyclists are dominant over pedestrians but not vehicles.

Ta-Da!!